Comfortable with sound and without.

There was a very interesting discussion on one of Yahoo groups that I'm in. I've copied my own response below:

Wow! This is an interesting topic. I don't think it's a judgemental one at all, but rather thought provoking. I also agree 100% that my son needs to be comfortable w/o sound at times, too, and he is. He copes very well when he is forced to be w/o his processor (I'm talking about the oldest boy, Matt).

Now, I absolutely did not set out to teach him this. He has learned it on his own. When his implant was activated and the sound scared him atfirst, I told everyone in no uncertain terms that the CI would stay on. I would allow the volume to be turned lower, only to be gradually brrought back up. But the CI would stay on. Both of my boys wear their CIs when they fall asleep at night, I go in and take them off and recharge the batteries while they are sleeping. We've never had to take them off in the rain, either, never had any problems with that. And call me a mean mommy, but when all of us were stuck travelling across country in a truck, the littlest one screaming at times, Matt wanted to take off his CI so he didn't have to hear the screams. I made him put the CI right back on, and told him if he wanted to hear, he had to hear the screams, too. Also adding that I sure as heck wish I had the option to take my CI off, too, but of course I don't have one. :)

But his comfort and self confidence became evident when his battery "died" when we were at dinner at DH's boss' house. I think he grabbed the wrong battery, one that wasn't fully charged. Since his batteries last all day and into the night, we've forgotten to carry spares, not needing them in the past. Well, Matt was without sound, but continued to play with the other kids just the same. We weren't close enough to run home and get him another battery. He could have stolen Josh's, leaving him without sound, but said he was fine w/o it. DH's boss' wife was just amazed that Matt was doing so well even w/o a working battery. That he really was comfortable playing with the other kids, not self conscious at all. It didn't even phase me until that point that he would do anything different.

Now Matt is invited to a swimming party where he won't be wearing his processor. It's a drop off party, but I've asked the mom if I could stay to help with Matt if he needs it. Even if Matt's processor were "splashproof", I don't think I'd let him wear it to the party. I know my boy, and the other kiddos that will be there. I would be worried about even finding the processor in the pool after they went through a round of dunking each other. That's just their reality. We moms don't like it, try to stop it, but can't control those 7-8 year olds every second. But the kids know Matt can't hear without it, Matt is fine with that, and he's told me he's not worried in the least, wants to go to the party with his friends. He is comfortable with himself and coping when he can't have his CI on all the time.

The CI is great, but it's not a cure for his deafness. I'm glad he can cope without it those rare times when he is w/o it. There's no way I could cope without my glasses, I'm practically blind without them. Maybe I could get through a day, without driving. But it would be difficult. Anyway, that's what I get from the discussion about "comfortable with sound and without". Very interesting topic! :)

--Karin, mom to the Bionic Boys
www.bionicboys.blogspot.com
BEA Volunteer

> I agree one hundred percent. There will always be
> times when our children are without sound, and they
> need to be comfortable in silence as well as in sound.
> There are times when I wish I could turn off MY CI,
> but I don't have one! :)